5 years...5 years since Team Popcorn was formed in memory of my son Scott. In those 5 years I have healed, I have found a way to remember Scott in a more positive way, think of him with more joy then tears, I have found friends, friends in many states who too have walked in my shoes. I have done this all because of the March of Dimes.
5 years ago June 2012, devastated does not even begin to describe how I was feeling. There is no word in the English language I have found to describe my emotional state at that time. My entire world that I knew including who I was as a person disappeared in one meeting at a hospital with doctors. Hearing the words in a conference room from multiple doctors that there is nothing they can do to save your baby. It is like someone is reaching into the very core of yourself and ripping you apart. I kept it together through his final days, through his funeral (almost cracking the day I had to plan to his funeral.) But it was one week, one week after I had laid my son to rest that I crumbled. I cried and I just fell to pieces. I was a wreck. I had lost all hope. I could barely function, barely get out of bed.
It was 8 months later I found the March of Dimes. One of the first things I found was Share Your Story. I was able to share Scott, not be judged, not having to hear all the platitudes of why he wasn't here with me. I found others who got it, others who were uplifting, and saying me too. I needed that. I found a place that I could go in the middle of the night when my mind was racing instead of sleeping. I could share my "real" thoughts and get the support I needed.
I learned more about the March of Dimes the next few weeks and learned about all they do for babies, and families. I knew we had found a way to celebrate and remember Scott while helping others. We formed Team Popcorn and have been walking, fundraising, remembering, healing ever since.
5 years...I am a new person. I can honestly say here that this new person I have become is a better me. Better than the old one before my new normal began. I am a better me, I am healed, I am all of this because of you, because of your support, your virtual hugs, because of the March of Dimes. The March of Dimes healed me and my broken family. It has helped us teach our son that you take a devastating event and you turn it around to help others. You dust yourself off, you stand proud and say we are here and we are going to do something about what happened and help others.
So I walk for Scott, I walk for me, I walk for you.
Thank you so much for sharing Scott with us, for sharing your story. Thank you for all you do for families like ours. So many hugs to you dear friend!
Thank you for all of the work you do here on Share, for March of Dimes, and sharing your Scott and Team Popcorn with us. While I wish things could be so different for all of us, I am so thankful for this site, and to have met you on this journey.
Wishing you great walk weather,
Thank you so much for sharing your story with so many people and for all that you do for the March of Dimes!
Love and Hugs
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