Twelve years ago looks very different than 12 years forward to today. Twelve years ago today, I was alone in my hospital room, cradling two little boys who had already been born and passed in the early morning hours. I didn't know how I would even begin to put one foot in front of the other, let alone learn how to breathe again.
Twelve years forward to today, March 7, 2019, I sit in my home office -- with zero thoughts on the work that lies before me. My girls are at school. And I would love to curl up on the couch under a blanket to remember, think and cry. Because no matter how many years pass, this week brings an edginess that I can't escape. Minor annoyances become big ones. Tears erupt at the slightest thing. On this day, the wound and the hurt contained within begin to pulse. And while this pulsing isn't the same as it was 12 years ago, it's a reminder of the love and ache I will carry until I see them again.
Sending so much love to you this week! I am thinking about you and your boys. I'm so right there with you.
Sending you a huge virtual hug, Erin! Thank you for always allowing us to hold your hand through this journey <3
It is incredible how much these anniversaries affect us, especially when its very subconscious. I hope that you got your moment to curl up and just be. Sending you so much love.
As the years pass by, I've decided that I'll never work on 02.07, then, we've added 31.12 and finally 07.03. 19. From my experience, yes I can say the pain never ends. These days the same questions come over and over again. The what if and specially the how.
Hugs to you
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