Last week, I laid in Lucia's bed with her, as I do some nights at bedtime. Bruno puts her to bed most nights now since I am often still with Annabelle then. But that night, I was clear and had some time to spend with her. We did her routine, including watching a video, reading books and singing songs. The song singing has been of the Christmas variety ever since the end of November when Christmastime was near. I've tried to get back into non-Christmas songs since it's now almost February. But Lucia is a very persistent and strong-willed little one, and so yeah, for now it's still Rudolph and Jingle Bells.
When we sing Rudolph, I had started this thing where I playfully pull her thumb out of her mouth throughout the song, which she loves. That night, as we lay in her bed singing Rudolph, me playing with her and pulling her thumb out, she begged me to "do it again, Mommy!" Me, being mentally and physically tired from the day, well, I wasn't super excited about doing the whole song again. And then it hit me. I remembered that Bruno and I had been seriously discussing taking measures to help Lucia stop sucking her thumb in the very immediate future. Like the next day, or some day that week.
Would this be the last time I would see my little girl sucking her thumb? The last time I would get to playfully pull it from her mouth? Even just typing that out right now gives me a lump in my throat. How many times did I look over at her and lovingly gaze at the pure sweetness of her sucking that thumb? I guess I knew that it wouldn't last forever and that yes, she'd stop eventually. But how did "eventually" get here so fast?? I don't know if I'm ready for "eventually".
With the pain in my heart of knowing that this may be the last time ever that I do this with her, I sang the Rudolph song again, pulling her thumb out with every "like Pinocchio", "like Monopoly", "like a light bulb", and "like George Washington". I did it as I silently wondered to myself if I preferred things this way - knowing that it is the last time - versus all those times that it'll be the last for something when I won't realize it. Like, I'm sure there will be a last time that I brush her hair, a last time that I brush her teeth, a last time that I feel her little hands on my shoulders as I help her step into her pants...but most likely, I won't know that it's the last time, because life will go on, and one day she'll brush her teeth adequately on her own, and then she'll do it the next night, and the next night, and the next night, and I'll be so busy going through the day, that maybe I won't notice that I'm not brushing her teeth anymore, and by the time I realize that I'm permanently removed from the tooth-brusher role, I won't remember when the last time I did it was.
Insert sigh here :(
I know she has to grow up. And I want her to grow up, because that means she's healthy. I remind myself that with each new stage she enters, there will be new and fun things we get to do together. But ouch. Sometimes it just hurts.
Marco - Thank you for nudging my mind that night to remember that Lucia's thumb-sucking days were numbered. I wish I could bottle up the cuteness of your sisters at the young age they are right now. But alas, there is no such thing. There's just living in the moment...and maybe taking lots of pictures...maybe too many pictures...but hopefully not too many that you miss the moment because you're taking the pictures :)
And speaking of taking too many pictures - because this post is about the end of Lucia's 4.5 year thumb-sucking era, here is one of my many favorite pictures of her with her thumb.
Oh momma- gosh did this strike a chord. You put into words the underlying anxiety I've been feeling with how quickly the days are passing so beautifully. How can these days we waited so long for be gone so quickly?
Oh Libby, this is such a beautiful, sweet post. Olivia sucked her thumb (and yes, pulled her hair out) until she was about four and a half. I didn't even notice when she stopped. Like you said, I was just so caught up in day to day life that one day I realized she hadn't sucked her thumb in weeks. And that was that. And yes, it was bittersweet.
So much love to you,
Recognizing those "lasts" in the moment....heartbreaking but achingly sweet. They do grow up, too quickly. Cherish the lasts, and the firsts.
Hugs and much love,
I totally feel you on the thumb sucking! Now that Abbey is 7 its a very serious issue as her teachers in kindergarten began having issues with it last year and 1st grade is pretty adamant that it stops completely. I began the process when she was 4 and it still pops in there every now and again..mostly when she is tired. I look at her older pictures of baby and toddler hood and I can't get over how cute it was... Now she can get dressed completely on her own, brush her teeth on her own,pack her snack for school.... I want her to do these things but wow does it hurt a little as she gets older and more mature.
Love and Hugs
the days passing quickly have been on my mind so much lately...if only we could slow it down some. I try to remember as well at bedtime every night when I'm ready to just get him tucked in so I can go do stuff that it won't last forever...hugs. Nicki
Oh what a cute picture of Lucia! she is a doll. So true, it is so sad when babies grow up, but as you said in each new stage there are some new fun things, even in their teens years (not so many, but still one or two fun things). The worst part for me was when they ask you that they can do it on their own, which is great but still the feeling of crushed piece of the heart. Glad to know Anabelle and Lucia are doing great!
The sweetness in that picture is just too much. I too am grasping at the notion of time going by far to quickly. I miss my thumb-sucking baby (Ian) as well as my paci-loving babies (H, R &W). Life marches on....or should I say.....life races on. Soak it all in.... every last moment.
P.S. Ian sucked his thumb until he was 9... only at bedtime, when he had his "Woofy".
Maybe Bruno won't notice if she sucks her thumb a wee bit longer. ;-)
Hugs and Love!
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