One of the hardest time during my pregnancies was the weeks I spent on bed rest. I remember with my first pregnancy trying to follow the Drs orders and stay off my feet. I knew that the little one tucked safe inside was not ready to enter this world at 24 weeks. I would spend 10 weeks on bed rest with him. I filled the time creating his scrapbook and a lot of time online researching all the “what if’s”.
Being on bed rest with our daughter was harder. I was placed on bed rest at 20 weeks after our ultrasound revealed that something was wrong. Our daughter wasn't growing. Being on bed rest with a very active two year old was hard. I am thankful for the friends and family that stepped in to help. I spent 5 weeks on “Dr google” researching again. My two year old did not understand why mommy couldn't play and I found myself trying to find games we could play together in my bed. We spent a lot of time watching Disney movies together ans having a picnic in my bed. I even took the time to introduce him to some old school Mario brothers. In those five weeks we also realized the depth of complications our daughter was facing. Trying to wrap my head around them while care for my young son from my bed was a very tough time. It was definitely an emotional rollercoaster. She was born at 25 weeks due to preeclampsia and passed away shortly after she was born.
With our last little one, I spent more time on bed rest. At this point I felt like a pro. Jadon was now 8. My mother in law was staying with us and helped carry some of the weight when it came to caring for Jadon. I dont know whay we would have done without her there to help. I think I spend more time here on SHARE through this bedrest. It was great having the support of those who had also gone through the same things. Especially those who had been pregnant after a loss. I needed someone who walked a similar journey after loss to help reassure me that Jaxson would be okay. Jaxson arrived after 9 weeks of bed rest at 32 weeks and is now a very happy healthy 4 year old.
Bed rest has been a big part of each of my pregnancies. I knew the importance of following the doctor's orders although it was hard at times. I still recall with each of my pregnancies how defeated I felt when the Dr’s would put me on bed rest. I still remember how I felt as though my body just couldn't do what “normal” pregnant women were able to do. For some women bed rest it mandatory and it took me a long time not to have mommy guilt over it. Now looking back I know that I did everything I could to ensure my kiddos had the best possible start. And I would do it all again for them.
You are such an amazing mother! And you are right, you did do everything you could and more. They are lucky to have you.
I like to call bedrest one of those necessary evils. It's what any and all moms will do as we understand it's likely best for our babies. But it's by no means easy.
Always remember you did everything you could for all 3 of your babies and they know that love.
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