Its been almost 12 years since we lost Trinity and our lives were turned upside down. Every dream we had was put on hold. The first 5 years I was grasping at straw, my husband was struggling, I was struggling and we were just trying to stay afloat. The last 7 years we have been working hard on rebuilding, working towards dreams we had, that we had somehow lost. Simple things like paying of dept, starting a business ect. One of our biggest dreams was purchasing a home. I never though we would get there. Yesterday we made an offer on our first home. Today the offer was accepted. If all goes according to plan we will close on our first home on August 24th.
This add a whole level of anxiety and stress to a very hard time of the year for me. Trinitys birthday and passing date is August 18th. The 24th is the day we held her service. Today I started packing up boxes of things we don't use every day. Today I packed up the shelves that held most of Trinitys belongings. It's amazing how my daughter whole life fits into a medium size shopping box.
Leaving the house we currently rent will be hard. 6 years of our rebuilding our lives, we brought our rainbow home to this house. Jadon finally became a big brother to a living sibling in this house. The walls of this house hold the fear I felt when I was finally pregnant again after losing Trinity. The walls are filled with baby cries I never though I would ever have again. They are filled with the giggle of a little boys who looked up at his big brother making silly faces. If these walls could tell a story I can imagine what they would say. They have seen it all. The good times, the hard ones, the struggles, the tears.
There are so many emotions filling my head and I am not sure how to filter them. It's going to be a very long month. I am excited and nervous but I can not wait to see what is in store for us.
Wow! Congratulations! I understand the mixed emotions that seem to always accompany change but I think it's great that you were able to meet this goal. I can't wait to see pictures. I also want to see pictures of what you do with Trinity's things. Maybe since you are buying a house, you could start a garden or something for her.
Congratulations! This is exciting, but understandably still a difficult transition. So many memories have been made in one place over the years and it's just A LOT to take in. I'm moving soon as well and our closing dates are just days apart! I can understand so many of these emotions. Take it one box at a time and again, congrats on your new digs!
Congrats Sam! So happy you were able to meet this goal, you and your husband should be very proud! Thank you for always sharing your heart with us... I'm moved every time I read one of your posts. I understand you're filled with so many different emotions but I know this will be a great chapter in your story. Just take it one day at a time. I love the idea from whosures about starting a garden in her memory.
Lots of love,
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