As I enter this new year things have got to turn around and get better. I'm tired of living in this funky existence. Right now if I don't leave my house for weeks at a time I'm really okay with that, and that's not gonna fly in 2015. When Zacc looks at me, I want him to be proud that I some how, some way, went on. It pains me constantly to think about him being gone, but I'm still here. I'm facing some extreme health issues right now, combined with my loss is extremely overwhelming. I keep forgetting that I have all of you. Please I am asking you as friends, STAY ON ME about keeping in contact. I need your support more than you know and I thank God for each one of you!!! Lifesavers, angels on earth, that's what each one of you are to me.
I had an evaluation last Friday to be put on a donor list for a kidney. Today the transplant team will meet to discuss my case to see if they will except me. My only requirement will be that I need to lose some more weight. So I'm all in for that but since my kidney disease has progressed my appetite has changed drastically. Things don't taste the same and we all know that in order to lose weight, well you have to eat. So today I'm suppose to receive a phone call letting me know if I'm on the list. Talking about nervous, times like these I wish I could drink!!!
On another note, my sister and her sons will be moving out soon!!!! This is good and bad. Good because I can walk around my house once again naked(lol) and bad because I gonna miss her rug rats!!! There is a little girl that I've taken interest in who is in a terrible situation and my prayer is once my sister moves out, to see if the little girl can move in with me. The girls mother was transplanted here from the south after Hurricane Katrina. She got pregnant while here and in her words "I'm not a mother." So another woman who also relocated here after Katrina has raise her little girl. The lady is not very nice to her at all. This little girl is so sweet and brilliant, I just hate to see her little light dwindle because no one took a interest in her or showed her genuine love and support. My brother adopted her little brother, and so it would be awesome to have her around all the time too.
So yes, I'm putting my foot down and deciding to live again and love without limits. I know it's what Zacchaues would want. I love you monkee.
I remember very vividly when I had this same revelation. It was so bittersweet. I hope the transplant coordinator calls with good news and you are able to be put on the list. I will be praying.
As for your sister moving out I know how much you are going to miss your boys but I am hoping this is going to be a blessing in disguise. Sending you love as always.
I hope that you meet the weight goal and get on that list. I will be keeping you in my close thoughts Nesha. 2015 will hopefully bring hope and more positive changes your way. I have the same thoughts too and want to make my angel proud. I know they'd want us to be happy and web are doing our best without them.
Hugs on this journey,
I hope that the news from the transplant team is good. Keep us posted on that, and I'm sure with your determination, you'll be able to drop the needed weight!
That's really a great idea about the little girl! It breaks my heart to see so many children who are not "wanted" or cared for out there when there are so many great moms unable to have children. They need great people like you!
I'm looking forward to updates soon.....HUGS!!
Girl, I love you.. Hang in there! I am always here. I will march my but over to you and get you out of that house! Hopefully they will put you on the donor list. I worry about you. Monkee is super proud of his momma. I am sure of it!
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