Yesterday I didn't bleed at all, I remained in my bed the whole day like I usually do & only got up to use the bathroom. The only time I stood up for a little was to brush my teeth after taking a long hot shower to take all that blood off of me from the night before. Today I haven't bled so far but the worry is still there. I'm really hoping my body can make it 3 weeks with no more bleeding. I get so scared when I start bleeding so much because secretly I don't want her to be born just yet. On Jan 23rd I signed the last paper I needed to sign for divorce for my ex-husband & I found out two weeks ago here in the hospital because I asked for an answer that unless that judge signs the papers I can't put my boyfriend's name on the birth certificate...I feel like my ex-husband is still haunting my life when I found that out. I haven't told my boyfriend yet because he really hates the guy & for some other reasons & I'm just praying every day I get the call from my lawyer saying they were signed. I read that putting my boyfriend is "easy" but would have to be through some court processes & some other BS we don't really need. I'm very worried about that. I don't want his heart to be broken & feel more hatred & like he was robbed of something.
Today I signed the papers where I let them tie my tubes...it's official. I feel like my life has been robbed from me by signing that form. I will have three kids total but I feel like I will be less of a woman without my tubes....& I feel the same way about the idea of my uterus being taken out. But after what I'm going thru with this pregnancy, I don't want to risk it again. So I made the decision it would be best for me if I just get them tied.
I'm sorry that you are dealing with so much right now.
Choosing to tie your tubes is a huge decision, it is a loss no matter how many children you have, when that decision is taken from you for health reasons.
I hope you are able to find some good shows or maybe get some coloring or journaling done to help the time pass as you wait for baby Eden. What a beautiful name!!
You've had quite a rough few days. I'm glad that bleeding has lessened. That's good. I remember having to have a hysterectomy when my baby was 2 years old. We had 4 children, 3 of which were born prematurely after prolonged bed rest. Getting them here was hard, and we knew that no more babies for our family was best, but it sure didn't make facing that decision any easier. It just feels so final. I like to think that we have a deeper appreciation for our babies because of all we've been through.
Keep doing what you're doing. Each day still pregnant is a huge protection for your baby.
Hugs! that a tough thing to come to terms with. It one thing when we make that decision on our own terms but when we feel like we have to or the sake of our health and what could happen in a future pregnancy its hard. We are hoping and praying along side of you as you wait the arrival of your sweet Eden.
You are doing great and are a super hero in my book!
I hate that you have to deal with all of this on top of bed rest and worrying about sweet baby Eden. Just know that every day she stays inside is good for her and we are all thinking of you, hoping for you and baby Eden, and your family. Wishing you peace with the decision about tieing your tubes for the sake of your health. It doesn't feel fair when the decision is more or less made for you.
Love and Hugs
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