Hi and welcome to Share. Congratulations on your sweet boy! It's great to hear how well he's doing after all the two of you have faced.
I'm so happy you've found Share and shared your story with us. All that you're feeling is completely normal. Sure you have lots to be grateful for but what you're going through is not the typical pregnancy experience. You're away from home, your baby's and your own life were at risk and you're now facing a NICU stay until your baby boy is ready to come home. You've lost a lot in this journey, therefore it's okay to be upset about it.
Be kind to yourself. I like to say "you gotta feel it, to heal it". Feel all those emotions.. don't push them aside. Be sad if you're sad. Be angry if that's how you're feeling. And then move through them. I found I was able to move forward when my babies were in the NICU by talking to others, and celebrating each of their amazing milestones that brought them one step closer to home.
As I said I'm grateful you've found us here at Share. We understand how you're feeling. Keep reaching out to us here. Maybe consider starting a blog to document your little guys progress and write about how you're feeling. We will walk this path with you.
You're not alone. Sending big hugs your way,