Hello. My name is Jessica. I have 2 girls 4yrs and 10yrs and my recent baby boy born October 29,2017. On October 24, 2017 i went in for my 30 week follow up appointment. The previous weeks I had been swelling in my face feet and hands, had ongoing headaches, and had been seeing spots of lights flashing blurry vision, weird episodes of cramping and vomiting, all the while being told by the midwife i had been seeing that it was all part of pregnancy never even being referred to a doctor to investigate on my symptoms. (sorry frustrates me every time) anyways, my blood pressure ended up running on the high side at my appointment and i was immediately sent to the hospital next door. There i was giving meds to lower my blood pressure iv fluids one of my 2 steroid shots to develop my baby's lungs in case he had to be delivered early and i was cathed i guess to monitor the protein in my urine. i was then flown by helicopter to a bigger hospital because the town i'm from doesn't have a nicu. when i got to the other hospital i was put on magnesium and monitored. 2 days later off the magnesium i got a sonogram and was told my placenta was calcified (didn't ever specify what stage), i definitely had severe preeclampsia, and that i'd be staying at the hospital to be monitored, my job was to try and make it as long as i could until i got my c section. i made it 3 days to October 29th, because my blood pressure wouldn't go down and baby Marcus was born. He came out screaming and crying i couldnt help but to cry because if he was crying he was breathing and it turned out he was a lot healthier than we all anticipated. one reason being that they thought he only had one vein in the umbilical cord and there ended up being all 3. today he is one week and 3 days hes off his oxygen and is being bottle fed once a shift. i'm so very thankful hes doing good, but i'm having a real hard time trying to cope with him being there. i find myself spacing out just wondering why i couldn't have carried him to term and why didn't they investigate my symptoms early on and caught it. i know i cant change anything that happened and i should be strong and appreciate the outcome because it could've been so much worse i just feel like maybe being on here and sharing this will help me feel a little better knowing i'm not alone, he should be home anywhere between the next 4-6 weeks (of course depending on how hes developing and growing) but it just seems so far away.