Being a mother of twins and a toddler

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When I  first found out I was pregnant I was overjoyed and ready to walk the familiar road of maternity once more. Then I  found out I was pregnant with twins and suddenly I  felt my feet falter and suddenly my path wasn't so certain. I  knew nothing of being pregnant with twins let alone raising twins. I had a two year old son already but there was only one of him, how could I raise two more like the same time?

Being pregnant with twins was scary and exciting all at once. Everything happened sooner in the pregnancy and everything could go wrong a lot quicker it seemed.  One week after my doctor had given me an early diagnoses of possible twin to twin syndrome, the amniotic sacs of the eldest twin damon ruptured. I  was 20 weeks pregnant and losing my mind with worry, stress, fear and frustration. What would happen now? Would we make it to a viable gestation age?

I was placed on bedrest at home for the next 3 weeks and 5 days after that. The amniotic sacs of the youngest twin named Kai ruptured at 22 weeks and I had a c-section at 25weeks and 5 days.

Now my twins are in the nicu fighting everyday just to survive and grow stronger.

Prayer has become a staple of my life much like food or air. My days have become a balancing act between entertaining my two year old and maintaining  appearances for him, as well as meeting the needs of my husband, all while remembering to go to the hospital and pump milk.

Some days are wonderful and others make me want to stay in bed and cry but I  am still hopeful that soon this crazy Rollercoaster will stop and all my sons will be home safe.

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