Cairo was born at almost 24 weeks due to preclampsia. I had no idea I had preclampsia until I was driving to work and began getting this intense pain in my upper abdomen and back. So, now I have a preemie at only 456 grams in weight and 11 inches long. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to go through in my life. I have to sit back and watch my child fight for her life and it just doesn't seem right that she has to. No matter how many times someone says, it isn't my fault, I can't shake the guilt. She shouldn't be going through this, it should be me. She's too small and I can see that she is suffering.
Tomorrow, it will be two weeks since she was born. She has grade 4 brain bleed that they are expecting to cause Cerebral Palsy. One of her lungs isn't getting air so she's on 100% oxygen after she was already down to 35 at one point. She has PDA so her other organs aren't getting the blood they need and now she has edema. The edema is one of the worst parts because I can see she is swollen and I know that can't be comfortable for her. I need her to make it, I need her to graduate from this NICU. Every alarm that goes off, breaks my heart over and over. I feel selfish for holding onto her and making her suffer like this.....
March of Dimes fights for the health of all moms and babies. We're advocating for policies to protect them. We're working to radically improve the health care they receive. We're pioneering research to find solutions. We're empowering families with the knowledge and tools to have healthier pregnancies. By uniting communities, we're building a brighter future for us all.
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