I had just had a routine check up on Dec. 16. Everything was normal. Until 2 days later, I hadn’t felt him move for a while. I was getting real worried so I went to the ER. There, they were trying to find his heartbeat but the nurse couldn’t. A doctor came in to do an ultrasound and that’s when I heard the worst possible news I could ever hear, “I’m sorry but there’s not heartbeat.” I was in shock. I just couldn’t believe it. He continued to explain some of his measurements and was told maybe it happened like a day and a half ago. I was 33w6d. Getting ready to take my next weekly bump selfie the next day. When the doctor finally finished explaining everything, that’s when I just lost it. I’ve never felt such pain. This was my second pregnancy, first one was an ectopic pregnancy. And I dealt with infertility for the past 5 years. This was my rainbow baby, a miracle. I didn’t think it could happen, naturally. I’ve never been so happy when I found out I was pregnant. And to just have it taken away, just like that. I don’t feel like I’ll ever heal from this. I just miss him so much. I want to be able to feel him inside of my again. Kicking me and stretching. I love you Liam and I miss you everyday of my life.