I had waited over 4 years to become pregnant the first time with my daughter Naia. My pregnancy had gone well, our baby was growing each week, I was gaining weight and my baby shower was a few weeks away. Our babies nursery was all set up and ready to welcome our first child home.
April 26th, 2016 I had my 24.5 week check up,my biweekly doctor appointment with my obs doctor. I went alone this time because my husband had a meeting that morning. We had gone to all the appointments together up until that day.
I remember being in the doctors office and he did my measurements and asked me how I was doing. He was relatively quick and was about to send me off, then I mentioned he didn't check our babies heart beat.
The went and got the doppler and took a listen. He couldn't find the heart beat. So he told me not to worry perhaps the doppler wasn't working. He went to get another one, and the same thing. This time he was worried and said usually when this happens it is because the baby is passed. He went to go get one more doppler and concluded he suspected our baby would be stillborn. I asked him how they would get my baby out and my doctor confirmed I would have to go into labor and deliver her. This was very scary to hear.
I sat there devastated on the bed in the doctor's office alone and completely unsupported. My doctor told me we had to do an ultrasound to confirm and I should call my husband to come. As I waited for my ultrasound, I called my husband and told him to come meet me at the doctor's as most likely our baby had passed. He was in disbelief and within 10 mins was at the doctor's office and we were walking into the ultrasound room.
As I lay on the bed with my shirt pulled up, belly out, the nurse put the cold ultrasound cream on my belly and started to look around. One minute later the tech girl said oh yes, no heartbeat, at least you are healthy. She then went on to say it looks like your baby died about 10 days ago because of the way her body is decaying.
I pulled my shirt and started crying deeply. I didn't say much and I went to the bathroom. I remember whipping the tears away from my eyes and I looked at myself in the eyes in the mirror and said, Julie this isn't yore fault, I love you you are going to be ok. .
Then a few minutes we were sent home awaiting the call for me to be induced and move to the start grieving the loss of a child brings.
March of Dimes fights for the health of all moms and babies. We're advocating for policies to protect them. We're working to radically improve the health care they receive. We're pioneering research to find solutions. We're empowering families with the knowledge and tools to have healthier pregnancies. By uniting communities, we're building a brighter future for us all.
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