Living my new normal

If only people knew the how lucky they are...

  • Hey Nicole, I understand. It's so hard to hear.  Lately it feels like there are little ones all around me in these therapy offices we frequent. Just yesterday, a lady whose son is a social group with mine, is in her third trimester. I just can't bring myself to start a conversation.  I just do the casual hello. I feel awful not giving that supportive nod, but I just can't. Also, it's when I hear the casual complaining of how many kids (4-6) a mom has to get ready in the morning in order to get to speech therapy. Urgh, I just want to tell her that it's wonderful she has so many kids to get ready and lunches to pack, but I can't do that. If I was a real witch, I guess I could then prompt that mom to look at the MOD Walk poster on the community board and urge her to participate and celebrate all of her healthy children, but no, I haven't done that, yet.

    Sending you hugs,

    Lindsay

  • Hey Nicole, I understand. It's so hard to hear.  Lately it feels like there are little ones all around me in these therapy offices we frequent. Just yesterday, a lady whose son is a social group with mine, is in her third trimester. I just can't bring myself to start a conversation.  I just do the casual hello. I feel awful not giving that supportive nod, but I just can't. Also, it's when I hear the casual complaining of how many kids (4-6) a mom has to get ready in the morning in order to get to speech therapy. Urgh, I just want to tell her that it's wonderful she has so many kids to get ready and lunches to pack, but I can't do that. If I was a real witch, I guess I could then prompt that mom to look at the MOD Walk poster on the community board and urge her to participate and celebrate all of her healthy children, but no, I haven't done that, yet.

    Sending you hugs,

    Lindsay

  • I know these irritations all too well. I'm often biting my tongue and holding back from saying a comment or two to thoughtless people. Anyhow, I just wanted you to know that I "get" your vent. It stinks and I wish people wouldn't take things for granted.

    Lots of love,

    Rebecca

  • HUGS!  Some people just do not realize how lucky they are!  

  • Oh Nicki - yes - yes - yes - I know.  I hear you - and am right there with you.  I can't take it either - hearing pregnant women complain about everyday little annoyances.  Of course - I try to look at it and tell myself that they don't know the horrors that we do - and that I'd probably be complaining about something trivial too had my journey been different....but it's so hard to see it that way when you are in our shoes.  So. Hard.  I struggle a bit lately when I feel like I'm complaining about the challenges of having a toddler.  I don't want to ever seem ungrateful - ever - but I am human, and some days are just hard!  

    Hugs to you!

    Libby

  • Nicole, I know exactly what you mean. I struggle some days (ok everyday, lol) with Easton, my 19 month old, but every single time I remind myself how incredibly blessed we are to be raising a feisty toddler. Pregnant women who know my story don't really complain around me, but if they know my story and still complain, they're going to hear something from me.  I really like Lindsay's idea of telling moms to join the MOD to celebrate their long pregnancies and healthy kids.

    Huge hugs, I know it is hard to hear other people's complaints when that is exactly what we are wishing for.

    Leigh

  • Nicole,

    I do completely understand. Part of me prays that they will stay oblivious to all of the what-ifs but another part of me wished they would just shut up. Of course I have to admit that even after Arianna died and I was pregnant with Keira I still did my fair share of complaining. I was so stressed and miserable that I just could not find the joy in being pregnant. Thankfully a very wise Share mom told me to fake it until I make it.

    I hope things ease up soon and your mom makes her goal of attending the walk. I've been thinking of you guys.

    Jami

  • Hi Nicole,

    Thanks for sharing your feelings because it's helping me a lot to know I'm not alone!