Living my new normal

irrational emotions

  • I completely understand where you're coming from. When I scrubbed in to the NICU to see Josie at the hospital, it was because I had to learn how to feed her through her tube at home, and learn from the nurses how to change the oxygen cannulas and when/how to watch for signals of discomfort. I felt like I was in a bubble because all around me were people learning how to change diapers and take temps and hold their babies because they were preparing for them to come home and live ;I was preparing for Josie to come home and die.

    Hugs

    Brandi

  • I agree, it can be hard hearing stories about all the babies that graduate out of the NICU. Although I am of course happy for them, it still stings and I get upset that how come Sean never even got the chance to be admitted into the NICU. Thinking of you.

  • I am so sorry that Scott didn't get to come home with you. A day where everyone talks about their trauma and loss is pretty overwhelming, but even more so when you experienced it. I read your story and it brought tears to my eyes. I imagined myself in your shoes and it was heartbreaking. I got to bring Bruce home after 99 days and we struggled through all of it. He is doing much better now and it is only now that I can truly see beyond my challenge and try to understand other people's. You have a right to all of your feelings even if other people might not understand them or if they seem irrational. They are not irrational, they just are what you are feeling and that is okay.

    Cassie