Living my new normal

just trying to breathe...

  • Brushing it under the rug is about right with my family as well. When things unfolded with my older sibling, it was the night before our first March for Babies walk. A year later, when my grandmother passed, she tried to reach out with a 1 or 2 line email, but never an apology. I kept silent. It is hard to maintain a relationship with those who aren't there for you emotionally in your time of need. I think many a family member assume that one would "be over" a loss with time. They don't understand just how devastating it can continue to be with each passing year and milestone. It's so awful that they just can't imagine or don't want to think about all of the decisions you've been forced to make. People just get so wrapped up in themselves. There should be grief etiquette. Isn't there?

    Continue to listen and be there for your husband just as you have. Maybe some of those others might come around in time, but if not, it sounds like you're prepared to let them go. I stress eat too. I guess I'm stressed all the time, but I'm functioning and happy-ish. It sucks when it's your own family who hurts you. This is your month. Don't let others take away from your celebration plans.

    Sending love and hugs,


  • Just... wow... holy wow. Our discussion on this topic in real life has gone deeper than anyone on Share would care to hear me elaborate on. I simply had to post my disgust with these people.

    Love and hugs.

  • So sorry you are going through this right now. Glad to hear your husband stood up for himself. Hopefully things can calm down a bit, sounds stressful right now.

  • O M G.  I'm so sorry, good night what a ... wait I can't find ANY Share friendly language to use.

    Scott's life and his story are so special... and in my humble opinion your in laws aren't worthy of it.  They just aren't- and it is THEIR loss not yours and not Scott's or C's.   They are not deserving of knowing the love and in turn grief you share with Scott.

    And when all is said and done, "Don't try to win over the haters- you're not a jackass whisperer".

    Much love,


  • Oh my gosh, they are quite the piece of work.  I am so sorry that you have to deal with people like that, it's so frustrating as like I said before your family are the ones that are supposed to be there for you, not treating you worse than they would treat their own friends who aren't even connected by blood.  Lauren is right, it's their loss, not yours.  I just wish they could pull their heads out to see it and see how special and important your sweet guy is.  Hugs mama.


  • It's good that your husband let them know how he felt, now the ball is in their court to make the situation better.  Continue to be there for your husband and don't waste your time responding to them just enjoy your family and don't allow them to have the power to make you upset.  In the end you are not the bad guys and Scott would be proud of you guys.