Thanks for the encouraging words about my talk with C about death. It wasn't horrible. and just like with every other major thing we have had to talk with C about he took it in, processed, and moved on. He got quiet when we explained how bodies are buried at cemetary. You could tell that was a shock and that he was processing that and wasn't sure what to think. But other than that...the book we read I think is what really helped. Showing a dog happy in heaven and looking down at his little boy. When we got to the part of the book where the dog sends his boy dreams. I stopped and asked C how does Scott let us know he is okay in heaven. We talked about the butterflies and rainbows. The part of conversations that was very hard for me was when he said very matter of factly Mommy if I"m ever in heaven I would send you a dog to the door to let you know I was happy. I know he was just letting us know that he is okay with death, and how much he loves us. But I don't EVER want to think about the possibility of my only living child being in heaven. After our talk we ate a yummy dessert I made and continued with our evening.
Since our talk he is more at peace with this fact of life I can already tell. We were at the table the next day and there was a rainbow in the clouds. C said that's Scott saying I'm happy hear in heaven. He has asked me some questions about heaven like are there really flowers there like in the book. I honestly told him nobody really knows we just know it's a very happy place.
So it was hard, but it is done and I think it has changed his thinking about death which is good with Halloween coming up and the fact that zombies are so in right now. He can now understand that all that stuff is made up and just to be "scary".
I'm so glad that the talk went well. I know it's been on your mind for a while. You handled it wonderfully. You don't know it but I'm taking parenting notes from you.
Much love,
Rebecca
I'm so glad you both came out of the conversation at peace. What a connection he and Scott have.
xoxo
Lauren
Sounds like the conversation went really well! Great job! I bet this same conversation will soon need to take place in my house with my newly turned 6 year old as well!
I'm glad the talk went well. I'm glad C was able to process it and move on. Love that he associated the Rainbow to Scott the next day. I still remember all these years later when Jadon first started asking question and we had to have the chat. Now that he is eleven he talks about his sister openly and he seems to be proud of her. Hugs and Love Always,
Samantha
Having a child in heaven can be so tough on the one's that are here with us. They don't fully understand what we feel and they don't understand the anxiety that comes with the fear of loosing them too. I am so glad the talk went well and that C is able to talk about Scott in such a special way. Each climb to the top of the mountain brings with it a beautiful view of the other side. Enjoy the view!