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Our March for Babies walk was this past Saturday. On the eve of the walk, I can't help but think about the very early arrivals of all of my baby boys. I can easily go back to each of my pregnancies and recall all of the details that led to their premature births. Our first son, Donovyn, was born at 32 weeks in 2005. I had been admitted at 31 weeks and 4/7 for severe preeclampsia. He spent 3 weeks in two different NICUs and came home just in time for Christmas that year. Our second son, Tristyn, was born at 34 weeks in 2007. It was discovered that I had lost nearly all of my amniotic fluid at a weekly routine ultrasound. We delivered shortly after I arrived at the hospital and he was able to come home despite being totally jaundice. Our angel son, Naethyn, was born at exactly 30 weeks in 2009. The economy was awful and people were losing their jobs and homes. I lost my baby.
I was seeing the same OB for all three pregnancies, someone I knew and trusted, who knew me. With the economy the way it was and being near retirement himself, he had not invested in the practice. He was let go and I was involuntarily transferred to another OB. We only had two visits together and we were not on the same page. With the guidelines for early C-section in place, she was talking maybe 37 or 38 weeks depending. I was high-risk. I should have been in that office at least twice a month if not weekly. In the end, I knew that something was up and called her in the late afternoon on a Thursday. She couldn't remember a thing about me. That I was 30 weeks along, had been on bedrest for 2 months, was a teacher, NOTHING. I described the swelling and other symptoms I knew too well. She told me it was "too early" and I should try and get help with the kids, stay off of my feet, drink plenty of water, and do some hydrotherapy. Right then on the phone, I felt doomed already. She was not the least concerned. I was glad that I called, but I didn't feel right. A few hours later, those awful cramps had started and I was shaking uncontrollably. They subsided and I made the decision to head to the hospital by myself approaching midnight.
Upon arrival, there was no heartbeat. I had preeclampsia and a placental abruption coupled with a blood clot. I was bleeding out and lost so much more blood because no one could get an IV started. I was that swollen. A call was made to my husband, we talked for a few seconds really, and I was off to surgery. I remember being in so much pain, tears streaming down my face, and the nurses accompanying me in the elevator up to the surgical floor were as silent as the baby I was now carrying. When I came to, my husband was there and we met our son together. He was beautiful and I treasure the moments of togetherness that we had with him. We have pictures of those moments and it's all the proof I have that he was here on this Earth, if only for a short time.
I think about all of this and so much more as I geared up for another wonderful walk in support of March of Dimes. I am trying to channel the pain and the grief into something positive. I think about the amazing families I've met and connected with while on this journey of "new normal." The ShareYourStory site has been a tremendous line of support these last 7 years just as it continues to be for so many. We need to keep walking so that more research can be done, more training can be put in place, and more guidelines established. On walk day, I feel so much pride as I watch hundreds of families and people out supporting each other for such a wonderful cause.
Note: The inflatable had just blown over. Nobody was hurt in the capturing of this picture:)
Thank you for all that you do! Thank you for walking, thank you for sharing your story with us and everyone else. Thank you for caring so much and being an amazing mom to all three of your sweet boys.
So much love,
Lindsay, Every time I hear your story I get so frustrated at your doctor. There are so many great ones out there, but there also some who just don't take pregnant mother's concerns seriously enough. I am so glad that you are okay, but so sad that you didn't get to bring Naethyn home with you. You are an awesome mom to your other two beautiful boys and the March of Dimes is so lucky to have you on their team. Our walk is May 14 and I look forward to walking for Bruce and all of these amazing babies!
Love and lots of HUGS to you! Thank you for sharing your three boys with us!
Thank you for all you do Lindsay! Like Cassie, I think that doctors should take the concerns of their patients seriously, whether or not we are "just moms!" Thank you for all you do for the mission and to raise awareness.
Love and Hugs
Lindsay - I hope that you had a good walk this year. Walking is such a beautiful way to honor your three boys. I wish you could have all three boys physically walking with you, but I know Naethyn was there with you guys.
Sending huge hugs,
Thank you for sharing your story, Lindsay! You are an amazing mom and so sorry for the loss of Naethyn. Love your picture from the walk! Thank you for all that you do!
March of Dimes fights for the health of all moms and babies. We're advocating for policies to protect them. We're working to radically improve the health care they receive. We're pioneering research to find solutions. We're empowering families with the knowledge and tools to have healthier pregnancies. By uniting communities, we're building a brighter future for us all.
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