MARCH OF DIMES | MARCH FOR BABIES | NACERSANO

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

LITTLE SEBBY

Today my nephew Sebastian Lucas turned 1 year old. He was born at 31 weeks and 2 days. My sister Lisa had fought in the hospital for 3+ days to keep him in her belly. Actually, the pre-term labor threat started around 20 weeks for her. She took Procardia and was on modified bedrest for many weeks. By 31 weeks, she was in the hospital on IV mag, almost paralyzed by the medication. The contractions persisted, and so little Sebby was born. He did great. He was in the NICU only for about 4 weeks. He was a little warrior in there. At 1 year old, Sebastian is a ray of light. He is healthy, happy and cute and is developing quite a personality. His birthday brings about many emotions. My sister and I were only 1 month apart in our pregnancies last year. We were so excited to be pregnant at the same time. Knowing that we would get to raise our babies at the same time. Watching them grow up as close cousins. When I found out there were so many problems with Marco, Lisa was devastated right along with me (as all of our family was). During the heat of the 7 week fight for Marco, there were many a night where we were on the phone processing all of this and crying together. One morning when she was in the hospital the weekend before Sebastian was born, drugged up on mag to stop the contractions, I was with her alone. A Eucharistic Minister came in to give her communion. He said a prayer for her and Sebastian. She asked him to say a prayer for me and my baby as well. As he prayed, she and I squeezed each others hands and cried. Her baby well inside her, fighting to stay in. My baby sick inside me, not knowing what the outcome would be. It was all so much. Two days after Sebby was born, I was admitted to the hospital and 2 weeks later, Marco was born. Sebby will not get to grow up with Marco here. They’ll never get to blow out the birthday candles together or play catch with each other. Marco will always be in his heart though, and we will all make sure that Sebby knows about Marco just as his other cousins know about him. The loss of Marco has affected the whole family. I know it has been hard for Lisa, raising Sebby while watching me mourn without Marco here. This time has been bittersweet for her. She has been so supportive of me. I just feel so blessed. I wanted to share with you, all my SHARE friends, what she enclosed in Sebastian’s birthday celebration invitation. It was a little slip of paper with a butterfly on it that read: “Dear friends and family, We hope that you will join us in celebration of Sebastian’s beautiful sweetness! As his birthday draws near and we reflect on this first year of his life, it is impossible to not feel deep sorrow that his cousin Marco is not here with us. Sebastian and his parents request that in lieu of a birthday gift, please make a donation to The March of Dimes in honor of Marco Luis Bianchi. March of Dimes is dedicated to improving the health of babies. The organization has been, and continues to be a tremendous support to Libby & Bruno and to countless families whose children are seriously ill or have passed. You can either make a donation by mail with the enclosed forms or online.” So, this blog post is dedicated to sweet little Sebastian. Marco, I know you will always be his guardian angel and will look over him in a special way. Here’s a picture of the little guy (from a 3 or 4 months ago)…

  • Beautiful.  So hard.  Wanting to be so excited for your little nephew's accomplishments and at the same time envious of what your sister has.  I have the same thing with my brother.  I envy his son's milestones.  I wish Zachary was his older cousin and paving the way.....

    I am so glad that your sister is so sensitive to what you are living through.  Keep living Libby.  Keep hoping.  Keep remembering little Marco.  

    You are an amazingly strong woman and you make Marco proud of you every single day.  

    I will say it again --- I CAN'T WAIT TO GIVE YOU A BIG HUG AT SHARE REUNION!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    :)

    Zsuzsi

  • Oh Libby.  This brought me to tears.  There's no words.  Your sister is amazing.  Sebastian is amazing and Marco is most certainly amazing.

    Lauren

  • What a wonderful sister! Where would we be without them? Her generous spirit must run in the family - so like yours in support of all of us although you are grieving Marco.

    I feel honored to be part of your "family."

    Shannon

  • Our family that holds us up are amazing!  Your sister is amazing!  What a wonderful tribute.  It brought tears to my eyes and warmed my heart!  What a beautiful impact Marco is making in your lives.

    God Bless you Libby and many hugs your way.

    Amelia

  • Oh Libby- that's just beautiful, just amazing.  Your SIL sounds like a wonderful and caring person.  What an amazing gift she's given to the two of you- a rememberance for your Marco.  Love it!

    As for me- i wrote that letter to my SIL and brother- and her response was quite graceous.  

    Thanks for sharing this story- you brought me to tears.

    Jennifer

  • ooops- i meant sister, not SIL.

    :)

  • That is such a beautiful story! So many times it seems like the world keeps going while we're just standing still...stuck.  It made me cry.  What an amazing bond the two of you must share- and what an amazing friendship.  

    While Marco may not have been here in body long, his spirit is still touching others.  Think of all the lives that can be saved in the future because of him.  What a special little man :)

                      *wiping tears and sending hugs*

                                           Julie

  • Your sister sounds like an amazing support.  I wish everyone could have someone like her during a loss!  That's such a special thing to do for Marco and in his memory for other moms and babies.  

    I know well about the close cousins thing.  My sister-in-law was pregnant with a daughter while I was pregnant with my first son, Cael.  Those two are now five years old and great friends!  The same SIL was also pregnant with a son while I was pregnant with Avery.  Now he's a strong willed two year old and I can't help but think of what Avery and I missed out on.  Another sister-in-law was pregnant at the same time I was pregnant with Tanner also...now I get to see those two girls together every Sunday.  It's just another reminder of what my poor Avery never got to experience.

    Take care,

    Megan.

  • Oh honey, what a beautiful story of sisterly love.  No doubt little Sebby WILL have a cousin to grow up with - even if he may be a year or two older.  Keep strong and have hope, your little child will come while little Marco watches over you all.   Sending you lots of love, Uncle ~B~

  • What an amazing gift that she has given to you as well!!!  I'm sure that Sebastian will grow to know and love Marco as the rest of the family, and will be quite thankful that his birthday was a day to honor Marco as well.

    Tracy

  • Leeb,

    What a beautiful post and tribute to Sebastian.  Thank you for this.....   I love the picture too...if only he would keep the sunglasses on!!  

    Those were tough times, beyond tough, last year, you at my side, nursing me,  when you were going through Hell.  I felt helpless to help Sebastian stay in, and helpless to help you!   It was so hard seeing you go through it all with Marco, so painful and just awful.    It's impossible to understand how or why it all happened.  

    Sebby and Marco were supposed to play together, grow up together, and yes, blow out their candles together.  I will never forget how you were there for me when I was on the mag.  You know I'm here for you whenever and however you need.  You are an amazing and strong woman.      I have faith that you and Bruno will be feeling the joyful part of parenting in the near future.  

    Keep the faith, keep breathing, you inspire me, how you put one foot in front of the other....

    Love you,

    Lisa

  • Oh and two more things:

    1-Sebastian will hold Marco in his heart....he will know his cousin through all of us.

    2-Thanks Marco for watching out for Sebby, I know you've already saved him a few times!!

    We love you Marco and we miss you......

    Lisa and Sebastian

  • Wow, what an incredible gesture! I love that! Your family sounds so supportive and I am so glad that you have people to mourn with and remember the tender life of baby Marco.

    Thank you for sharing the picure, what a cutie!

    Hugs,

    Kami