For the last eight years, I've worked at the same company, in various positions, providing telephonic education, support and coaching to people who are working on managing health conditions, weight, stress, etc. It's been a good place for me, but the time has come to move on. For various reasons.
With hard work, persistence, and a LOT of patience, I have finally found an exciting new opportunity, was given an offer, and accepted! (insert party emoji here). Hooray for stars aligning!
With that being said, I can't help but to feel some kind of feeling - one that I can't seem to pinpoint - about my departure from my current company, and I think it has to do with all that I've been through in the last 7 years with pregnancy. So much has happened in my personal life since I started here, and it's hard not to feel some kind of attachment to my employment here because of that.
I think back to where my life was when I started this job. I was just shy of my 27th birthday. I had literally just married Bruno. And when I say literally, I mean that I started the day after we returned from our honeymoon. In fact, I may have still had some sangria running through my blood. Just kidding ;) We had just moved into our first apartment together. Everything was ahead of us. It was such an exciting time in my life.
Fast forward one and a half years, and I can still vividly remember sitting in my boss' cubical fighting back tears while telling her that I was pregnant with my first baby. The tears weren't of sadness or anything like that - just emotion. Excitement, fear...all of that. Twenty weeks later, I would call that same boss in tears again. This time, tears of real fear. Fear following our consult with a perinatologist that was set up after the first signs of trouble with Marco were identified. Telling her there were serious concerns for our baby and that I had just had an amnio done and that I'd need to be off work the next 2 days.
I can still remember walking in and out of our office doors countless times to take or make phone calls regarding my pregnancy over the next 5 weeks after that. Sitting on the floor in the lobby while I talked to Bruno after we got the good news that the amnio results were normal, even though that would only lead to more unanswered questions.
Then there were all the times in the bathroom, looking at my belly in the full-length mirror they had there. Watching, waiting for it to grow.
And then I lost Marco and returned four weeks later. My team was so supportive. Someone who had started during my maternity leave gently approached me a few weeks after I had been back. She wanted to express her condolences and also to share that, 20 years before, she had lost a baby too. A son. Full-term. Due to stillbirth.
There was the time, the year that I was trying to get pregnant again after losing Marco, that I paced in our empty conference room while on the phone with my sister after an upsetting appointment with an OB.
And the day when I got the 2nd blood results back that confirmed the pregnancy with Lucia looked like it was officially a GO. I remember watching the snow fall as I looked out the 4th floor window of our building and called Bruno with the good news.
I could go on. So many memories in that building, with a really good group of people. For the last 4 years, I have been working at home rather than in the office with this job. Things have been different, and I haven't felt as connected to the company or the teams of people in general. But there are still lots of memories even from the work at home years, because that's when I've been navigating the road of parenting a living child after a loss in raising Lucia, trying to get pregnant with Annabelle and then being pregnant with Annabelle.
All in all, I am very happy and ready to be moving forward. I'm excited and energized about the new work I'll be doing. And at the same time, I am feeling a bit of.....sadness maybe...over letting this part of my life go.
Marco - my time at this job will be a time I will never forget, because that is the time when you were with us physically, and when you sisters made their way into the world. I know you'll be shining your light on us as bright as always as I take this next leap.
Libby,
I can understand so many of these feelings. That building and your former co-workers in it will always be a part of your journey. This new opportunity sounds amazing and I will be thinking about you as you move forward taking this next step.
Sending you love and a smooth transition,
Lindsay
Congratulations on your new position! I hope that your friendships with the co workers at your former company will remain friendships that will last especially since you've been through so much with them. It's tough to make changes for me and I understand that connection through memories. Hugs as you start at your new job and I hope that you'll find great friendships and support there as well.
Tracy
congrats on your new job! It can be hard to move forward sometimes and make changes especially when your job gave you that connection with Marco. I hope that you new job is awesome. Nicki
Congrats on the new job! I totally understand what you say about all the memories of pregnancies in your various rooms at your job. It's nice to remember those memories and all the support you received. Best wishes in making many new great memories at your new place of employment!
I can understand your connection to the people and the space. Like you, I have snapshots frozen in my mind of times in my life that changed my course, and me as a person. Some are beautiful, some bitter.
Marco goes with you as you begin your new job and new adventure. I can't wait to hear more about what you will be doing. Good luck! You're going to be great.. this I know.
Hugs and love,
~Karri