MARCH OF DIMES | MARCH FOR BABIES | NACERSANO

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

RISKY, BUT WHAT THE HELL, I DID IT ANYWAY

I just had a realization: Angel moms take “risks” that a woman who's never had a complicated pregnancy would never ever consider a risk. An "ordinary" (not that there's anything wrong with them) pregnant woman might think that dying her hair is risky or carrying a heavy grocery bag, or something like that. I just took a big just now, but it was nothing like that. It was a risk involving the hope that I would be delivering a healthy baby in August. I took the risk of marking my due date on the calendar. Of course, my fear is that if something were to go wrong this time, that it would be too painful to flip the calendar to August and see the 12th marked “Little Foot’s Due Date”. I did it anyway though. This baby deserves my hope and strength. He/she deserves the due date marked on the calendar. Oh, tears are just kind of flowing right now. Tears for this baby. Tears of hope, love, and fear. It kind of feels good to cry because I think it’s been a while (at least since I cried about something real). I just hope with all of my soul and being that this baby is healthy. That he/she comes home with us and cries and coos and smiles and opens those beautiful eyes to see this world. I want my dogs Benni and Sammi to be able to give kisses to the little one (don’t worry, probably only on the foot). I want to be able to actually clean out our office and make it a nursery. I want to lay the baby in the beautiful cradle that my dad made for my nephew when he was a baby 11 years ago and that my 3 other nieces and nephews have slept in since. I want to watch him or her dream about their sweet angel brother Marco. Oh, I could go on, but this post is already longer than I anticipated it being. So, here’s to hope, and to the fear that comes with it. The fear is just natural, but I will try to just ride it and not let it conquer me. Here’s to a healthy birth/delivery/baby in early August. Here’s to all of you amazing strong angel moms out there who have given me so much strength. Here’s to you my angel baby Marco, the one who gave me strength that I never knew I had. Love you baby.

  • You know they say that life's about taking risks...  It's just all in how you look at life as to what is considered a "risk"!  Good for you on marking that calendar!  We're all here cheering you on as you make your way towards "Little Foot's Due Date"!!

    Tracy

  • You should be proud of yourself, Libby!  You are such a strong woman and an inspiration. Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.  :)

    Jenny

  • That was a huge step Libby.  To write "Little Foot's" due date on your calendar is no easy task and you are so right in your thinking.  That date gives you a goal, something to focus on, and the way the months are rolling, August will be here before you know it:)

    Lindsay

  • Hi Libby,

    I understand those feelings and am still going thru them at 37 wks pregnant. It's such a roller coaster of emotion that requires strength, determination and faith. However I know you can do it :). Whenever I had moments of panic I thought how little Gigi deserves my strength. I hope you are able to relax and enjoy your pregnancy. I have found now that I am near the end, how much I missed out on enjoying being pregnant cause I was so worried. I will be thinking of you

  • Oh, I am just discovering your news. Congratulations!!! It is scary taking that risk.  But hope is good...it gives us strength in its own way. Keeping you in my thoughts. We'll be with you for the ride, praying for that healthy,  happy, full-term baby in early August for you!

    Hugs,

    Donna

  • You are so amazing!

    Katie

  • Leeb, I love you and am praying for you, Bruno and Little Foot every day!

    Lisa

  • You are right on! What seems like a normal thing to another, is a huge step for us.

    I want your lil one to come home with you and for joy to be restored in your life. Your baby will never replace sweet Marco, but will certainly help in being hopeful and perhaps at peace.

    Thinking and praying for you,

    Kami