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7 years ago I could not find any beauty on this day! I was angry, mad, heart broken... so many emotions I cant even begin to describe.
Today we packed the boys up and headed to the Springs. It was beautiful. As we got to the springs it started to sprinkle. The big trees covered the parking lot, moss hanging from every branch. The sun was shining bright as a few rain drops along with a few sun rays made it through the canopy of trees. I looked up and saw such beauty in that moment. WOW! beauty, on a day when my heart is so heavy, a managed to see some beauty.
The boys played for a little over 2 hours in the water as I sat and watched Jadon and his best friend interact. I watched Derek with Jaxson in a float and I again saw the beauty that is surrounding my life. Of course how I wish there was a little girl hanging around her daddy's neck in the cold water. But I know she was with us.
As we were leaving Derek was taking the boys to the car and I decided to walk through the little makeshift butterfly garden that they have there and there was a few butterflies flying around and as I tuned to walk out a butterfly landed on the walkway of mulch. It landed right in front of my feet and as I went to walk by it the closer I got it didn't budge. I leaned in real close to take a picture and I was sure it would fly away and it didn't. I literally had to walk around the butterfly to get out of the garden. I turned back just before getting to the entrance and then the butterfly fluttered away, I want to believe that my angel was with me, that she was letting me know she was okay. I have never had a dream or a *feeling* that she was near. When I *thought* i have in the past I always talk myself out of it. But today I believe she was there! She was with me! She was beautiful!
Tonight we released our balloons together along with Trinity's Molly Bear. The boys had a blast! Then we celebrated He birthday with Ice Cream at DQ.
As we tuck the boys into bed tonight I feel blessed. Blessed from the messages of love and support from so many of you! Blessed to have had Trinity remind me that she is always with me. Blessed to have my beautiful boys tucked safe in their beds knowing that Trinity is watching over them. Today I feel blessed!
Trinity: thank you for the gifts today, thank you for making me the person I am today. Thank you for bringing such amazing people to travel this journey with. I love you baby girl! One day we will all be together again! Until then please keep an eye on your brothers. I miss you everyday!
What a special and beautiful day... so fitting for such a special and beautiful lil' girl. Happy Birthday sweet Trinity! You are loved and missed.
I am so glad that you, Derek and the boys were able to send Trinity so much love on her special day. Parenting an angle is not an easy thing to do but you do it with perfection and grace. No doubt in my mind your make your baby girl very proud. Sending you lots of hugs today especially with your big boy starting fourth grade.
Happy Birthday Trinity! I am so glad to know that you all shared a nice celebration in her honor. I think that lingering butterfly was definitely her way of saying that she's right there with you all Sam, with you.
Happy birthday Trinity! Samantha, I'm so glad you had a special day to celebrate Trinity's birthday! I got chills reading about that butterfly. I am sure that was a sign sent straight to you from your sweet angel. Thinking of you!
Sounds like your girl was definitely with you throughout the day showing you all the beauty around you and letting you know she was there. Happy belated birthday sweet Trinity!!
What a beautiful day for Trinity. I am glad that you were able to honor her in your way. Happy Birthday Trinity.
Happy heavenly birthday to your beloved Trinity :) Sounds like you all had such a lovely day. I'm so glad to hear that you were able to really take in the beauty of what you were surrounded by - love. No doubt that Trinity was with you all.
Lots of love!
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