What a beautiful name for an angel.
I loss my baby girl Meg at 20 weeks. She is our first angel. Was feeling just like you. I was physically having allergies to pregnant women after that. I decided that I badly need to have a baby as I was feeling like all these feelings was driving me nuts. 2 months later I was pregnant. I never had an easy pregnancy. I was so anxious all through these 32 months that I had rashes all over my body. Same feeling like you, I badly wanted baby Meg that I didn't know how I'll feel. I give birth to my son Ryan at 32 weeks. He is my everything! He was so tiny that I didn't know how to hold him, only 1.5 kgs and 56 cm. He's now 12 and already 171 cm. As soon as he was able to understand, I told him about big sis Meg. At no time he is meant to replace Meg. When he was 8, I lost a baby boy Aiden at 22 weeks and this month I lost baby Boule dou at week 24.
People tend to pity us as they don't know how to react. This is something that makes me angry.
Only remedy is time. Pain will always be there but you'll learn how to live with.
I want you to know that once you'll see your baby you will fall for him or her immediately. Your baby girl will always be your angel.
We are special as we have angels.