Confused and sad

Hello everyone!  I'm new here so please hang in there with me.  My husband and I lost our baby when I was just 18 weeks in September of 2009.  Giving birth to my dead child was heartbreaking and earth shattering.  It all started with passing clots.  I'm not talking pencil eraser size....some were the size of golf balls.  All I was told is that "it can be normal for this to happen during a pregnancy" which I knew deep down was a huge load of bs.  I just felt off.  I was told placental abruption and then I was told that sections of the placenta were hardening and breaking apart causing me to lose water.  I've been so focused on trying to get over what happened that I never really contacted anyone to find out exactly what caused this trauma.  To make matters worse, the doctor that performed the D&C didn't make sure everything was removed.  Two months later I was still bleeding and cramping.  I went to the emergency room and was referred to an obstetrician out of town.  He took a look at the results of my ultrasound (I never got the results after over a week) and discovered the placenta was still firmly in place and fusing to my uterus.  I had to have yet ANOTHER D&C which left tons of scarring.  I have a very, VERY mild period.  I have little cramping and I could easily use one panty liner the entire two days it lasts.  Flash forward 10 years and to the reason I'm reaching out to all of you.  My husband and I have been discussing trying for another baby.  I want to give him a child so bad, but naturally I'm scared.  I know my emotions can lead to infertility and I'm trying to control them and talk with people.  I'm doing better.  My question to all of you is this:  What should my steps be in determining whether this is something we should even attempt?  I have no idea what to do.  Am I the only person that this has happened to?  Have any of you had severe scarring and still managed to get pregnant?  If you have gone through this, what did you do to have this miracle of pregnancy happen?

2 Replies

  • I didn't experience that specifically but we did loose our first child. You just have to have faith and discuss with your husband and doctor carefully. We wanted a child badly too and took all the necessary steps and were blessed with a second child. We got pregnant just 2 months after our loss. Your in my prayers.
  • I'm sorry for your loss and how traumatic. I know u posted this so long ago but some women are prone to clotting g during pregnancy and would need to see a hematologist also if you are pregnant again. U may need injections of a blood thinner , perhaps lovenox, during pregnancy to prevent clotting . A specialist could address scarring, perhaps high risk obgyn can help. Hope this info helps . Again I'm so sorry, Dawn