Living with a Loss? Angel Parents check in here..

Living with a little one in your heart instead of in your arms can be full of bittersweet days.  Comfort can be found among other "angel parents".  Living a New Normal is a place to share your days and memories with other parents who understand.

762 Replies

  • Every Memorial Day there is a beautiful lantern floating in Honolulu. You can leave messages to loved ones here, lanternfloatinghawaii.com/remembrancesManager and they will include them in a community lantern, and then you can also watch the ceremony on a live stream- it is such a beautiful and peaceful remembrance ceremony.

    xoxo
    L
  • In reply to Miss Princess 2009:

    I am so sorry for your loss. I lost our son in 2009. At times, I just can't grasp that so much time has passed already. Before this baby, I had two children. They too were born prematurely. I hope that you can openly discuss all options with your doctor and maybe even get a second opinion. I wish you the best and know that you can always reach out here.

    Hugs,

    Lindsay
  • In reply to Miss Princess 2009:

    Hi Miss Princess 2009. Welcome to Share. I am so sorry for your loss. I had another baby after giving birth prematurely, so having a premature baby doesn't necessarily mean that you can't have another baby. But as Rebecca said, you should definitley talk to your doctor.  Your doctor will be the only one who can help you decide what is right for you.

    Hugs,

    Marissa

  • In reply to Miss Princess 2009:

    Hi Miss Princess 2009,

    I'm sorry for what happened to you in 2009. Only your doctor will be able to discuss whether or not you can have children in the future. The ladies here at MOD Share Your Story are able to emotionally support you and cheer you on if you should decide to try to conceive and become pregnant. Also, I invite you to visit the marchofdimes.org site to see the work March of Dimes does.

    Best of luck to you,

    Rebecca

  • In reply to grandmamary:

    I Had a baby in 2009 premature. "She" (I believe with all hope). What I want to know is, does this mean I can't have children? I have had 2 miscarriages and I'm at risk of losing my ovaries due to PCOS. Can March of Dimes help me conceive and give healthy birth?

  • In reply to Aidan Eli:

    Aidan's Mom - It's okay to be thinking about your angel on a daily basis. Ours is still the first thing on my mind when I wake up in the morning and the person I think about before I go to sleep. It's just the way it is. I'm still healing too. Hugs!

    Grandma Mary - Still SO good to have finally met you at SU awhile back:) I think it's really neat that your granddaughter wanted to wrap a present for her sister. I like to think that the angels are being taken care of by our loved ones there too:) Hugs!

    Marissa - There is an angel tree at my husband's school that appears in the lobby each December. I go in and browse the tags looking for boys with the same age as our angel had he lived. I don't know if that's weird or not, but it helps me to feel better. I think the school's receptionist initially thought I was looking at the items wanted, thinking I was cheap, but after including staff in MOD fundraisers, she knows what I'm doing when I look. With each passing year, some things get easier and some things get harder. It hurts deeper in some ways and always on our minds. We have those conversations at our home too and in public. I welcome them as I don't want the boys to ever feel awkward about their evolving feelings for their angel sibling. Hugs to you!

    Lindsay

  • In reply to lvazquez:

    As days go by I can't stop think of my son Aidan,losing him took a toll on me and no matter how many questions I ask myself know that I will never get the answer that I'm looking for.Its been almost a year sine my son's passing there's never a day that I never thought of him,my husband asked me how do I feel now and I told him that I'm fine because I'm not fully healed yet but also I know that our lord is taking good care of him until I see him in the life time.

  • In reply to Hunter and Randi's Mom:

    Marissa:

    It is a bitter sweet thing as our angels are remembered. This is a conversation you never dreamed you would have to have with your children.

    It also opens up another whole can of worms as to how people react to them when they mention their siblings in heaven. Another lesson they learn way too soon in life.

    Sorry this year was extra hard for you. We do miss out on all the things we planned on doing with our angels. Christmas and birthdays sure are a reminder of that as we look at presents we would have, should have been buying for them.

    Hugs and a Shoulder to cry on,

    Grandma Mary

  • In reply to grandmamary:

    Grandma Mary

    I love the ways that you and your granddaughter honored Brealynn this Christmas.  I donate a gift each year for a girl that is age Randi would be. This year was hard - she would be six and there are so many fun presents we could have played with together.

    I found it to be a struggle for me as Hunter began to grasp the concept that he has a twin sister who is not here with us. I think at 6 he now has a pretty good grasp on it, but the conversations between 3 years old and now, while so special and important, always left me so sad. And the same is happening again as Reid starts to understand that he has a big sister, even though I've been through these conversations before.

    Hugs,

    Marissa

  • In reply to lvazquez:

    I went to help decorate the angel tree at a local hospital. It is hard to believe I have now made 5 ornaments in memory of Braelynn for the tree.

    The other day I got a call from my almost 9 year old granddaughter wanting to know how to spell Braelynn because she was wrapping a present for her. The fact that her parents help keep the memory of her cousin alive warms my heart. This is one of my local granddaughters that went with me to the walk to remember. Her dad was there with us as Braelynn died in Bethany's arms.

    AJ in the past hadn't seem to get the concept of brothers and sisters since he doesn't have any earthly ones living at home. Sometimes if he was asked if he had brothers or sisters he would say the names of his cousins. Well, last night I got a text from Bethany telling me the asthma doctor ask AJ the question of siblings and he told her "Yes, I have a sister Braelynn, but she lives up in heaven." I know he probably still doesn't totally "get" it, but he must be starting to. This year he is in a pre-kindergarden program at the Catholic church so maybe the heaven idea is talked about at school too.

    I can't wait to talk to Bethany to see what the doctors reaction was and my son-in-laws too.

    It is hard not to have Braelynn here, but I am so thankful for the small ways she is remembered and not forgotten.

    Thinking of everyone as we approach another holiday without the special little ones with us. I try to envision them up in heaven celebrating with other family members who have gone before us.

    Love to all,

    Grandma Mary

  • In reply to Hunter and Randi's Mom:

    I can sympathize with you. I had 24 twins. One of my identical girls passed at 2 days old. When I see twins I get sad. R.I.P  Sa'Keena momma loves you

  • In reply to My kids3:

    My kids3, many hugs go out to you and your daughter. I don't think this journey ever gets easier. I'm sorry that your daughter has to go through this, but I am glad that she has you to lean on.

    erin

  • In reply to grandmamary:

    Thinking of you, grandmamary.

    erin

  • Hi Grandma Mary-

    Missed seeing you at SU, but thought about you:) A few faces were missed this year, but I'm so glad that I did get to meet you in person the year prior. It sounds like it was a lovely Walk to Remember. I'm so glad that there are more and more of these events to honor the angels.

    Hugs,

    Lindsay

  • In reply to grandmamary:

    Hi!

    I have been thinking about you.  I was asking Jami about you at Shareunion and if she had heard from you.   Hope things settle down for you and lots of hugs!

    Nicki

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